Ever called someone accidentally? Me too, but there is a big difference in pulling the phone from your pocket to dial and having your pocket dial the numbers.
The “pocket call” doesn’t happen too often with flip phones, but if your friends own an open-faced phone, like the iPhone that just called me from Tyler’s pocket, you may soon become a victim of the pocket call.
If you are the victim of a pocket call, relax, don’t worry…it’s all part of becoming a man, or woman, or both. There are three steps you’ll want to know in the event of an inbound pocket call.
1. Answer your phone
2. Listen to find if the person is sharing any information of value (i.e. dirt, passwords, the location of hidden treasures, etc.)
3. Depending on the situation, you can also have a little fun…
Based on your ear investigation, figure out where the pocket is calling from. Once you do, you’ll want to employ the following tactic based on the scenario. Keep in mind you’ll have to maintain a high volume on your voice to ensure your heckling is heard.
A meeting: Pucker your lips and create a loud fart sound.
Church: Yell “AMEN!”
A movie theater: (see meeting scenario)
Getting their shoes polished: Personify the fly, or “personifly.” This is the best because you can really get your personality into it. Say something like, “Hey! Come here. I want to tell you a secret.”
By now you get the picture. When you’re done having fun on account of the other person’s airtime, hang up.
I just burned nineteen minutes and three seconds worth of pocket-call airtime. Tyler called and I yelled his name so loud I could have easily shaken loose change, a Chapstick, a set of car keys, or the pair of balls resting safely nearby.
Ross,
Thanks for always putting a smile on my face with your words of wisdom!